Well I haven't been writing as much lately mainly because most of my ideas come to me in a drunken/drugged up stupper and I fall asleep before I can write them down...
Don't get me wrong I'm ok, I mean I have a grip on things mentally and I'm not acting completely neurotic anymore...most of the time  ( 8
I've just been stuck in a weird place, I have come to an understanding of people that I avoided for so long. That people may not mean to be but are mostly...looking out for themselves. The junkie in me gets it. I understand it but I am not excusing and and foregoing the idea of self control. When you truly love someone and care about them I believe that self control is possible. We must be polite when we turn a lover away because we are all just puzzle pieces and sometimes we just don't fit. After all the fighting and pushing and pulling some things were just not meant to be.
Friendships are generally the same rule, don't give anything away until someone has earned your trust.
I'm not going to pretend I am an island but I'm not going to pretend I trust and like people who I don't.

If life is uncomfortable do something about it.